Up Close and Personal Read online

  He shook his head. ‘I’m fine, thanks.’

  She settled the kettle back on the worktop. ‘Well, make yourself at home. I need to go and check on Debs and then I’ll take you back to the hotel.’

  ‘Remind her I owe her a visit to the studio. We talked about her bringing her drama class, too. If she’s still keen, we could organise something next week.’ Her look of surprise must have shown on her face because he sighed. ‘You thought I’d forgotten.’

  ‘Well, not forgotten exactly. I thought you’d offered just to, you know, be kind.’

  ‘It’s not very kind to offer and then not deliver on it.’

  Perhaps not, but many celebrity clients had done exactly that – tickets to their shows, autographs – and not followed through. She was starting to realise Zac wasn’t someone she could neatly put a label on. ‘Okay, as soon as I’ve checked Debs is okay, we’ll head off.’

  His jaw clenched and he dug a phone out of his pocket. ‘No need. I’ll order a taxi.’

  ‘No, you won’t.’

  He gave her a look of disgust. ‘You can’t seriously expect me to drag you away from your niece to play chauffeur?’

  ‘And you can’t seriously expect me to let you make your way back to the hotel unprotected.’

  Cursing, he thrust a hand through his hair. ‘I don’t want to be a burden, Kat. Debs needs you. Go to her.’

  Immediately her irritation slipped away. He wasn’t trying to be difficult. He was trying to help. More, in offering to take Debs round the studio, and in coming with her tonight, he was being kind. ‘I’ll go, as long as you promise not to leave.’

  He exhaled, shoulders sagging in defeat. ‘Fine.’ He glanced towards the sofa currently piled high with newspapers, magazines and clothes. ‘I’ll try and find a few square inches to sit on.’

  And there it was again, finally. The dry humour she hadn’t realised she enjoyed, until she’d had a week without it. ‘Feel free to move things.’

  ‘Good Lord, no. I don’t want to ruin your system.’ With that delicious quirk of his lips he smiled back at her, and for a brief, tantalising moment, the worries over her niece, over Zac and how to protect him, even the worries about her growing feelings towards him, drained away.

  As Kat climbed the stairs, she felt as if a small weight had been lifted from her.

  ***

  Zac shifted on the sofa, his arm brushing against the precariously piled magazines on his left. He tried to read the title upside down. F1 Racing. He should have guessed.

  A thought hurtled through his mind and he hit the search engine on his phone. When he’d found what he wanted, he tapped out a message to his assistant. Then slumped back against the sofa and sighed.

  He felt like a nuisance, a responsibility. An obligation Kat needed to fulfil, even though she clearly already had enough on her plate.

  Hell, when he’d held her, she’d almost cried. Even now, the memory of the way her body had shuddered, far too briefly, against his, cut him to the quick. It was that very vulnerability, the warmth, and yes, the softness that lay beneath her tough exterior, that tugged at something deep inside him; a reminder of the journey she’d taken to become this brave, bold, big-hearted woman he was enthralled by. Let down by her parents during her childhood, and from what she’d just hinted, let down by early boyfriends, too. Yet she’d come through both with her sense of humour, and her love of life, still intact. It was no wonder she wasn’t interested in the fickle celebrity with a posh upbringing a world away from hers – she didn’t need the angst. She might find him attractive, but Zac knew he was a long way from the type of guy she wanted. That lucky sod would be strong and steady. A guy as fearless as she was, happy in his skin. A man like her, who knew exactly who he was.

  Not an insecure actor still playing a part.

  On that miserable thought, Zac leant his head back and closed his eyes.

  About twenty minutes after she’d left him, he heard footsteps and opened his eyes to see Kat walking down the stairs. She started when she saw him, a clear sign she’d forgotten he was still here. Another job to tick off before she could finally get to bed.

  ‘Is Debs okay?’

  ‘She will be.’ Kat perched on the arm of the armchair. Possibly because the chair itself contained a few days’ worth of post, an iPhone charger and a water bottle. ‘She’s a lot like her mum, when she was that age. Mandy was always flying off to some party, mixing with older guys. Drinking. It’s why she ended up pregnant at nineteen.’

  ‘And you? Where were you when Mandy was out?’

  Kat grimaced. ‘With her, of course, which is why I know it’s such a bad idea for Debs.’

  He wanted to carry on talking to her, two friends chatting, not bodyguard and client, so he chose his next words carefully. ‘I guess the alternative, staying at home, wasn’t an option?’

  ‘Not if I wanted to avoid being yelled at, treated like a skivvy or seeing Mum being a doormat to my drunk bully of a father, no.’

  Though he’d half-expected the answer, it still made him wince. ‘I suspect now you could take your dad down with a flick of your wrist. Have you ever been back?’

  ‘I’ve thought about it, many, many times. But no.’ Her eyes avoided his as she stood. ‘Are you sure you don’t want a drink?’

  She was open and direct, so it wasn’t hard for him to know when there was something troubling her. Rising from the sofa, he moved to stand next to her, tucking his hand under her chin so her eyes were forced to meet his. ‘What is it?’ She shook her head and tried to move away but he held her by the top of the arms. ‘Tell me.’

  ‘Why? It’s not like you’re going to reciprocate, is it? You’re not exactly Mr Chatty when it comes to talking about your life.’

  He flinched, knowing he deserved the jibe. Never had he hated the lie he was living, more. What harm would it do if he told her? So what if she let it slip, if she told others? Did it matter anymore?

  Yet if he was only ever going to be a job to her, was it worth the risk? Especially as she’d see him in a different light, probably a less favourable one, cutting his already low chance with her down to zero.

  ‘I feel guilty, alright?’

  Kat’s voice shook him out of his internal ramblings. ‘Guilty about what?’ he asked softly, dismayed at the tortured expression on her face.

  ‘Guilty about leaving Mum. We left her with him.’

  She made to move away again but he kept his hands on her arms, knowing full well if she wanted to escape, she could. ‘Your mum wanted to stay. If she hadn’t, she’d have left, too.’

  ‘No, you don’t understand. Dad … he was a bully, sure, but he had this sort of power over us. It was like we were programmed to do what he wanted.’ She inhaled an agitated breath. ‘Mandy and I, we hated it, but we still did what he told us. When we asked Mum why she put up with it, why she stayed with him, she just smiled and said where else would she go.’

  Zac understood all about powerful, bullying fathers, though of course he couldn’t tell her that. William Edwards was about as gentle a man as it was possible to meet. ‘You’re stronger than your mum, Kat.’ Relaxing his grip on her biceps, he slowly ran his hands up and down her arms. ‘You can’t blame your eighteen-year-old self for getting away as soon as you got the chance.’

  ‘No.’ She blinked those dark eyes. ‘But I can blame adult me for not going back to check on her.’

  Her expression was wracked with guilt and he ached for her. ‘Sometimes, in order to cope with our present, and look ahead to our future, we have to put the past behind us.’ Nobody knew that better than he did. Nobody.

  Of course, Kat was far too smart to miss the words he hadn’t said. ‘Is that what you’ve done?’ Before he could answer, she shook her head and stepped back. ‘Nope, forget it. That’s probably one of those super-nosy questions I’m not allowed to ask. You being a celebrity and all that.’

  ‘Kat.’ Frustrated, he reached for her hand. ‘Yes. That’s exactly wha
t I’ve done.’ He hesitated, and answered more honestly, ‘Am trying to do.’

  Nobody was more surprised than he when a slow smile slid across her face. ‘There, that wasn’t so hard, was it? Admitting that teeny-weeny bit of information about yourself?’

  ‘I’d tell you more,’ he answered quietly, bringing his face closer to hers. His eyes dipping down to her soft lips. ‘But I’m only a job to you.’

  Her breath hitched. ‘You know you’re more than that.’

  ‘Do I? Am I?’ He bent his head, his lips daring to touch hers. When she didn’t pull back, he tried again, this time bringing his hands up to clasp her face. To draw her closer. When her lips parted, he groaned, his tongue diving into the sweet depths of her mouth. Christ, she tasted even better than his imagination. Before he knew it, her arms were winding around his neck, and he wasn’t the only one moaning in pleasure. Wasn’t the only one trying to press closer and closer. To take more and more.

  On a gasp, Kat pushed him away, her eyes fevered, her breathing heavy.

  ‘I don’t want to hear how that shouldn’t have happened.’ His voice was almost a growl.

  ‘I know.’ She lifted a hand to her chest, clearly trying to calm herself. ‘I guess at least now you have your answer.’ When he looked at her questioningly, she gave him a wry smile. ‘I’ve never kissed a client before. Ever.’

  Satisfaction burned through him. Enough to ease some of the ache. ‘Good to know.’

  ‘Good for you, maybe,’ she muttered, picking up the handbag she’d abandoned on the coffee table. ‘Now I really do need to take you back.’

  ‘I could always stay.’

  She hiccupped out a laugh. ‘Oh sure, because that’s a really sensible option after what just happened.’

  ‘It doesn’t have to be in your bed.’ Though his blood flashed hot just thinking about it. ‘I could sleep on the sofa.’

  ‘Oh no you can’t. I’m not having those pheromones of yours sneaking through my bedroom door. You need to take them away from me.’

  ‘They are pretty strong,’ he agreed, perhaps a little too smugly. ‘Are you sure the hotel is far enough?’

  She shook her head in an I can’t believe he just said that gesture and marched towards the door. As they settled back into the Jeep, Zac felt the first sprouts of hope nudging through the despair of the last week.

  Yes, she’d stopped the kiss, but she had let him kiss her. More than that, she’d been as into it as he had.

  Chapter 13

  It was Monday evening and Kat was doing her usual sweep of Zac’s hotel room as he waited outside. Thankfully Mark had done the weekend protection duty, giving Kat two precious days to get over spilling her guts to him about her mum. And that kiss. Unconsciously she paused, placing a hand to her chest, willing her heart to slow. Crap. Two days was nowhere near long enough recovery time.

  Considering everything that had happened on Friday, she’d expected today to be awkward, yet it hadn’t been. Zac had been … well, back to his usual self. Smooth, quiet except for the odd dry comment. Occasionally he’d flashed his sexy smile but not once had he mentioned the kiss.

  Maybe he’d forgotten about it. Maybe he wasn’t obsessing about every moment like she was. And wow, that hurt, but there was no place for her feelings in this current arrangement with Zac. As achingly, gloriously perfect as it had been, there wouldn’t, couldn’t be a repeat.

  Opening the door to his bedroom, Kat noted the total lack of any clothes lying around with a wry smile. In fact there was a lack of any personal items other than the toiletries and shaver she could see in the en suite.

  Her eyes skimmed over the tidy surfaces and onto the carefully made bed – she’d like to bet he’d done that himself – before zeroing in on a white card lying on top of a pillow. She took one look at the bold pink lips and cursed. Violently.

  Did you think you could escape me? Now I know where you sleep.

  How the hell had the stalker followed Zac here? Hot on the heels of that question, was another, even more sickening one. Had she cocked up? Was it her fault?

  ‘Err, hello.’ Zac’s voice echoed through from the sitting room. ‘Can I come in or are you still removing the bogeymen from under my bed?’ A second later he walked in, his eyes dropping to the card in her hand. ‘It’s another note, isn’t it?’

  ‘Yes.’

  He cursed and turned full circle. When she went to follow him, she found him sitting on the sofa, head in his hands.

  ‘Sorry.’

  He lifted his eyes to hers. ‘Why?’

  ‘They should never have found you here. Maybe I didn’t notice we’d been followed.’ The sick feeling magnified and dread pooled in her stomach; she’d let him down. Put him in danger. ‘Damn it, I should have swapped cars more often. Been more careful.’

  Shit, how was she going to tell Mark?

  ‘Maybe they haven’t followed me at all,’ Zac countered. ‘Maybe they trawled all the five-star hotels until they came across one where someone was willing to talk for a fee.’ Rubbing a hand across his face, he let out a sharp, frustrated exhale. ‘Christ, Kat. This isn’t your fault.’

  Kat wasn’t sure Mark would see it that way. Heck, she wasn’t convinced of it, either. But Zac was looking shaken, so she pushed aside her doubts and sat next to him, bumping her arm against his. ‘I like your version better.’ He attempted a smile, but his glorious eyes were flat, and his handsome face etched with strain. ‘I won’t let them get any closer. I promise.’ She meant it. The crappy doubts could go and take a running jump.

  ‘I know you won’t.’ His unflinching gaze, the certainty in his voice … her chest tightened in response. ‘But it’s just a nutty fan. The closest I’m likely to come to danger is being kissed to death.’

  She sensed he was trying to convince himself, though it was hard to tell, him being such a good actor. She’d not actually appreciated how good he was until he’d knocked on the door at the party the other night. To the teenager who’d opened the door, Zac had been that off-duty cop. No question.

  Still, she didn’t want him to act in front of her, and especially not over this. Complacency could get him killed. ‘I know you want to think it’s just a harmless fan, but what if it’s not? What if instead of planning to kiss you to death, they’re planning to knife you to death?’

  He visibly paled beneath his tan but she hardened her heart. His safety was her priority. Not his feelings. Not making him comfortable.

  ‘Obviously you can’t stay here tonight.’ Kat rose to her feet. ‘Gather your things while I make a few calls.’

  He inclined his head in acceptance, the weary nod of a man who’d been blindsided. It took all of her effort not to fling her arms around him and hug him tight.

  While Zac packed, Kat phoned Mark. He answered on the second ring and swore like a trooper when she told him about the note. ‘I could have cocked up. I could have been followed,’ she admitted.

  ‘Do you think you made a mistake?’ Instantly her mind flashed back to another time, when she’d asked herself that question over and over again. ‘Kat?’

  She swallowed, shaking off the memory. ‘No, I don’t.’

  ‘Then you didn’t. This person must have paid someone off in the hotel. Hopefully we’ll get a good look at them on the CCTV.’

  The certainty in his voice helped to settle her stomach. ‘Thanks for the show of confidence, boss.’ She glanced again at Zac, who’d finished packing his case and was now watching her from the bedroom doorway. ‘Do the police still think it’s the waitress from the party?’

  ‘They do, but she gave a false name and address. They’ve had to get a photofit drawn up from the staff who worked with her. Her long hair fits the description of the driver who turned up at the Edwards function. They’re sending me a copy tomorrow so you can keep an eye out and show Zac. See if it sparks any memory. Meanwhile we’ll get the hotel CCTV reviewed.’

  ‘Okay.’ It was progress, she guessed. ‘Any suggestions for w
here I should take Zac tonight?’

  Mark sighed down the phone. ‘The flats are both occupied. Guess it will have to be another hotel.’

  Kat’s eyes flicked over to Zac. His shoulders, usually so straight, sloped a little, and the film-star face staring back at her was etched with tension. The last thing he needed was being bundled off to another faceless hotel. ‘I’ve got a better idea. I’ll take him back to mine tonight.’

  Zac’s eyes widened in shock, the look almost comical. Ignoring him, she focused on what Mark was saying.

  ‘Are you sure that’s wise?’

  ‘It’s only one night. We’ll sort something else out tomorrow.’

  ‘What’s wrong with a hotel?’

  She read the subtext from Mark’s question, and it annoyed her. With Zac listening, though, she could hardly blast back with the answer he was looking for. Just because she’d offered to put Zac up in her home, didn’t mean she was becoming attached. Didn’t mean she was doing anything as stupid as falling for him. ‘He’s been staying in a hotel,’ she answered evenly, ‘and look how well that turned out.’

  Mark let out a heavy sound of annoyance. ‘Fine. As long as you know what you’re doing.’

  ‘Of course I do.’ As she ended the call, she realised it was the first time she’d ever lied to him.

  ***

  Zac stepped warily through the front door of Kat’s house. The second time he’d been here in the space of a few days. The first had just been a stop off, but this? He really wasn’t sure why he was here.

  ‘Mark isn’t happy with this arrangement, is he?’

  Kat, busy clicking switches to turn off the alarm and whatever other security feature she had set up on a state-of-the-art-looking panel, gave him a cool look. ‘Your safety is my responsibility. It’s my decision.’

  ‘He’s the boss though, isn’t he?’ Zac paused, perfectly aware it was none of his business. Damn it though, he needed to know. ‘Unless he’s something more?’